Oh, Crap. I'm embarrassed.

The TAKS Test was today. It was super easy, and I'm pretty sure I got like at least an 85.
But, it didn't go off without a hitch.
In fact, there was a disaster, right when it started.

As my teacher was telling us to break the seal, I did so...on the wrong test.
*sigh* Within the TAKS test booklet, there are two tests. In this case it was the Science Test, which we took today, and the History Test, which we are taking tomorrow. There is a little sheet with formulas, that's for the science test, and it was in between the Science and History test. I thought that BEHIND the sheet was the Science test.
As I happily broke the seal, I realized in horror, that it wasn't, in fact, the science test that I had opened; It was the history.
I was so scared, and my face showed it. My teacher rushed over and was all "What's the matter?"

Me - "Ummmm, I.....opened the....wring....*GULP*...test."

Coach Boenisch - "Oh, crap."

Me - "Yeah, I know."

Random kid - "Really, Mark?"

Me - "Why God? What is this, sarcasm?"

This was SO embarrassing.
Coach Boenisch walked over to the room phone and called the principle.
I remember thinking Oh, shit. Am I in trouble?
Here is THE REAL side of my teacher, Coach Boenicsh's, conversation with the principle.

Coach Boenisch - "Look, I don't know if I need to contact the president or what, but I have a kid, for the first time in 25 years of TAKS testing, that opened up the wrong seal......Yeah, I don't know where his brain is....Well, should I just take him out into the hall and shoot him?.......Yeah, that would be too messy.....well, do we expell him or what?.....Oh, o.k." *CLICK*

He got a piece of Scotch Tape, walked over to my desk, and taped it. If it was that easy, why don't they just keep it unsealed all the time? Seriously, what the shit is the seal used for? Is it magical? Will it be inhabited by demons without the magic seal to protect it? Will Dobby, from Harry Potter start secretly living in there, until its opened on TAKS day? I think it's a very big waste of paper.

Then, after that whole debacle, I went to open the correct seal, and I ripped the page.
I neglected to tell anyone this...until now.

And speaking of waste of paper, there were pages where there was one tiny, little, question on it. Do you realize how many trees we could save if we use as much space on one piece of paper as possible, and use smaller print, on the TAKS? We could save like 1,000 trees!!!
Hey TAKS, why you gotta be so environmentally un-friendly, GIRL?

My new blog!!

So I've learned how to post drawings.
I would right now, but I'm typing this on my iPhone.

I have a whole new blog that's dedicated to drawings tht I randomly think of.
It's pretty epic.
It's called yayisuckatdrawing.blogspot.com
Check it out bitches.

American Idol:)

I love this season.

My favorite is Lauren Alaina, this season; she is so amazing.
Then it's James Durbin.
My 3rd favorite is Haley Reinhart.
They are friggin awesome.

But....there's two that I hate; Jacob and the dreaded Scotty. *Shudders and pukes*
Jacob is a too dramatic, and Scotty is a stupid little cocky D-Bag.

I have the American Idol sound track for the final 8 and for the final 7.
I really hope Lauren wins.
Also the name, Lauren, is my favorite name for a girl.
*FATE*
imma marry her, or Lauren Conrad someday.
And no, not just because of their names.



I'm trying to choose between an iPad 2 or a MacBook Pro 2.
I have enough money, that if I was sure that I wanted it, I could get a friggin iPad 2 TOMORROW.
If I was sure I wanted a MacBook Pro 2, I could get it in 2 or 3 months.

Ugh, I feel like I'm the Bachelor and I've gotten down to the last two girls.
Maybe I'll just pull a Brad Womack and ditch both and wait for the white iPhone4 that comes out in a couple weeks.

Ahhhhhh!!! What to do!? What to do!!?

National Idiot Day

Tomorrow is national Pot Day.
*Cheers/Applause*
Yeah, pot's amazing.


Just kidding. I'm such a wimp that I wouldn't even be able to touch that crap, because I'm afraid that if I touch it, it'll give me like Cat AIDS or Cancer or something.

Yeah, I'm a loser.
God, I'm going to suck at college.
Meh....screw em. I'll be all smart and they are gonna be all "Duuude....I gotta ask you something. It's really important, so pay attention.....do you like Pretzels?"

So yeah, I'm gonna be the Neuro Surgeon fixing their fried brains.

Well it is college.

I might have 2 "brownies"
3
4


8

Anywhooo....Al Pachino is officially crazy. Wanna hear about it? No? Too bad.
In Science we were making stinkbombs out of some stuff that I think is used to artificially make Skunks, and it released like this big repulsive ball of yellowish-green smoke into the air. That's when Al decides to take a big ol' Smell. Clearly to him,
it smelled like candles or something.
I took a tiny littel inhale and started to feel something crawling up my
throat.
I knew that wasn't a good sign so
I ran in the opposite direction
and started saying things like "Shame on you!", "That's disgusting. PUSHUPS." and "What is wrong with you? This isn't War of the Worlds. Apologize!"

Al decided that this was the best smell in the world. He then forced our teacher to make another batch of devil's fart.
It's an even bigger puff of crap infested air.

Al inhales and blows out the air, like cigarette smoke, in me and my Mexican friend
Salma's direction.
It smelled like a Walrus exploded in my face.

I immedeatley started my rampage.

Me - "Are you kidding? Are you friggin kidding
me!!?"

Al - "BAHAHAHAHAhH"

Me - "What's so funny, dumb****? You are ****** disgusting. What is the ****** matter with you? Shame!"

Al - "BhHHJHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH"

Me - "You are ridiculous. I hate you. Look at you. You're so ugly. Look at you're teeth. They make you look like a retarded vampire."

Al - "Actually,"

*He's getting serious. Like he's gonna school me now.
Which is ironic because he couldn use some better schooling.*

Al - "I have been diagnosed with Vampirism."

Me - "..."

I was waiting for the punchline.

Me - "For real?"

Al - "Yep."

Me - "BAHAHAHAH you know for a while I was on the fence about whether or not you're insane, but now I know you fricken crazy. Do you really think you're a Vampire? Wow, I'm not really suprised."

Al - "I figured with all of the *Rude word* you say about me, that you knew."

Me - "I thought it was a rumor, *Rude Word*. Wow, you're frigging insane."

Al - "You're an *Rude word*."

Me - "Oh, go suck my Jugular Vain. Oh, sorry. I forgot. You're retarded and probably don't know what a Jugular Vain is. Sorry, I apologize for using big word speech talk."

SCRE4M

SCRE4M is epic.
It is the best movie I have ever seen.


It's like God, Jesus, Wes Craven, and Neve Campbell got together and said "Hey you. Yeah, you Mark. We love you. Here is the future winner of Best Picture."

SCRE4M is genius. I dare you to go see it.
My mom and I went to go see it together and the theatre was empty. We were all alone in a gigantic theatre.
It was so amazing,
It was as amazing as candles.
You all know how I feel about candles.

There is only one thing I can compare watching it to: Riding a Unicorn with Hayden Panettiere through an Angel's back hair.

Al Pachino, Scarface, Burger Flipper, Felon, anti-christ, BOB. Meh, what's the difference?

Al Pachino, is the biggest jerk I've ever met.

He likes to call himself "Scene" which just thought of, is laughable. I
may not be "Scene" or "Gothic" or "Emo" but I know "Scene". I'm pretty sure my bff Britney is "Scene" and he is definatley not that.
He was talking about how something that would hurt a real human, didn't hurt him and I was all "Yeah well, Al Pachino, nothing hurts you because you're a freaky emo. And he was all "I'm NLT emo, assface. I'm scene."

Me - "Actually my best friend is scene and let me tell you something. You're definently not scene. Scene kids don't wear baggy jeans. Scene kids don't wear tennis shoes. They definently DO NOT cut.

Al Pachino - "You don't know ANYTHING!! *Demonic Hiss*"

He hissed at me.
Hissed.

That next period me and Britney were sitting in History.
Then incomes Ally hissing demonically.

Me - "Would you please shut up. The whole scary moan/hiss thing is really friggin annoying."

Al - "So are you. I hope you die and go to hell you a**hole!!"

Me - "Ditto. DI-TTO."

The whole class laughed and I felt triumphant.

*Later during class in front of teacher while studying.*

Al - "Education is retarded. All that matters is getting a drivers licsence."

Teacher - "Yeah, then you can get in your clunker am drive it to McDonalds to go flip burgers."

Al - "Yeah well, my uncle started flippin' burgers at a McDonalds and now he owns 14 diffent McDonalds."

Me - *Siigh*

Britney - "we just want to friggin study.....JERK."

Al - *Demonic Roar*

He is such friggin weirdo.
I think he's gonna shoot up the school one day.

My fright level: Fucking Legit.

I'm writing this on my iPhone.
Sweet.


So I'm scared. It's 3:44 A.M. and I'm so scared I can't sleep so I'm blogging about it.
I watched "Scream" last night and twice today.
I watched "Scream 2" and "Scream 3" tonight.

"Scream 1" is my new favorite movie but the first part with Drew Berrymore is almost too scary to watch.
And I've seen the Rebecca Black music video for "Friday"

Anyway, I'm pretty sure Ghostface is hiding in my closet right now.
Like, I don't know if I can sleep tonight.
I'm currently watching "South Park" for damage control.

I think the first "Scream" is the best. The second one was good but it wasn't nearly as amazing. The third was WAY better than the second, but the original is my favorite.
I'm dying to see the fourth.
Critics are saying it's as good as the first one.
I hope so!! I want to see it so friggin' bad.
Like with a passion.

I think I have an addiction.
A "Scream" addiction.
I love feeling the adrenaline rush through my vains.
It's like my own personal Heroin.
I really want to see the 4th.
Hayden friggin' Panettiere is in it.




I fucking love her.

Bossypants

It's my new favorite book.
It's by Tina Fey, and it's friggin hilarious.

It's inspired me.

I've given up on my last book, so I'm going to retry writing a book.

A funny book.

Not one of those memoirs where I admit that I was once a drug addict and/or that I was molested/abused by my older cousin Lance.
Books like that scare me.

I have to do it now.
There's pressure now that it's on the blog.

Crap.

Really? Scream 4?

I know that that movie fanchise kicks ass, and if I had to be stalked and then killed by any serial killer that I wanted or my whole family would be shot, I would choose Ghostface; But it's getting excessive.

If I escaped from the same serial killer 3 times, then he somehow found me, got my number and tried to kill me AGAIN, I'd be so pissed.

Like, if I were the main character, Sidney, and this was happening, for the 4th time, I'd ghetto stomp the dude doing this to me.
I could imagine the phone conversation...

*Ring-Ring-Ring-Ri-*

Me - *picks up phone* "Yellow?"

Ghostface - "Hello, Sidney. Remember me?"

Me - "Are you kidding?"

Ghostface - "What's your favorite scary movie?"

Me - "Really? Again? This was scary the first 2 times, now it's just getting excessive."

Ghostface - "You're not living this time."

Me "Come on dude. This is gotten to the point to where it's just sad and ridiculous."

Ghostface - "Bitch, you are gonna die!! HAHAHAH you have NO idea what's coming!!"

Me - "Listen up, assface. You are so annoying. If this doesn't stop, I am going to get my black friend, Bree, to kick your white ass. There are like, 7 BILLION other people on this planet, and you can't find another person to stalk? I wi-"

Ghostface - "Don't ever talk to me like that again or I'll gut you like a fi-"

Me - "Shut up! Shut up. I'm not finished talking to you, ass. You are not a nice person. Don't you have a life? Seriously! Go read a book. Go get a job. Go to college. Kiss a girl! Do something with your life, other than violently killing teenagers. By the way, you are supposed to be killing teens; I'm like 28 now. MOVE ON MAN. Quit killing people you crazy pshyco bitch! I will shove your knife up your ass. What is your problem?!"

Ghostface - "Well, umm. Wow.....I uhh..."

Me - "If you try to kill me I will junkpunch you."

*Click*

If somebody would stand up to the pshyco that is stalking them, they would end the killing spree, before it happened.

Battle For The Living Room.

*Originally written at 2.54 am*



Right now all I want to do is watch a few old Grey's Anatomy episodes.
Yet, I'm not.
"Why?" you ask?
It's because my father is in the living room on his laptop working, when he should be doing that in his office.

I LOVE old episodes of Grey's and I have ALL of season 5 in there.
It's calling, crying, and BEGGING me to watch it. I want to watch it, oh, so much.
It's my destiny.
Right now, my father is keeping me from fulfilling that destiny.

You might be asking yourself "Why don't you just go in there and watch the dang show? It's not that big of a deal."

Well, you're wrong.

He hates it when I stay up past 9:15. I practically went through Normandy to move my bedtime, (That title is so stupid.) to 10:30 pm.
It's not like I'm in the military, and have to get up at 4 in the morning to go kill sandmonkeys.
It's so ridiculous.

I'm listening closely by the door to make sure the coast is clear to go start Grey's Anatomy, so I'm writing this on the iNotes app on my iPhone. I'm gonna post this in the morning.
I feel like a soldier in the war, writing in his journal.


Wait...
My Dad turned the porch lights off.
I hear movement in the living room.

It's quiet now.

SCORE.



UPDATE: Shit. He's in there.

He's fucking sleeping on the couch in the dark like some sort of Pedo-Ninja waiting in the night for his next victim.

Look's like there's not gonna be any Grey's Anatomy for me tonight.

*Sigh*

Sickly

Yesturday I was sick and.......was forced....to stay home from school.

I don't exactly know what disease God struck me with, but I do know that it was awful, disgusting, deppressing, lame, and unnecessarily painful.
I don't even know how to describe it.



Oh, I know
It was like being in the mosh pit at a Lil' Wayne concert.
So Yeah, you know it was terrible.


My illness lasted for about a day and know I'm just exhausted.
This post was a lot better in my mind....


I just watched How Do You Know; it was funny.
I love Reese Witherspoon.

hmmmmmm.

I might have fixed my paragraph problem.

TEST. TEST.

UPDATE: YES!! Epic Win.

An ear molester and an actual rapist.

Okay, I have a few big issues with this so called singer/lover of Fridays.
Rebecca Black is the worst singer I've ever heard and I, along with the world's population, hate the song "Friday". Not only does Rebecca Black have the most Jewish voice that I've ever heard, but also she is a liar.
She claims she loves Fridays, but if she really did, she wouldn't have sang a song about it that sounds like the Devil's wedding song. I've heard her sing the National Anthem without all the auto-tune and junk, and she is actually pretty good. She would probably get to Hollywood Week on American Idol and not amount to anything else when it comes to singing.
She basically sucks at life.

Speaking of suck, I think Enrique Iglesias is a Rapist. Have you heard that song "Tonight I'm Lovin' You?"
IT'S F****ING CREEPY.
Seriously, somebody arrest this disgusting Cuban right now. What was he thinking? "Oh, I'll write a song about possibly raping some stripper, and to make it even more offensive, I'll add Ludacris into the mix. THAT will make it a sure-fire hit."
What has happened to music?



P.S. - I would only last 1 minute and 10 seconds if I were chained to a bunkbed with a Velociraptor, but, on a positive note, when it tore my arm off I beat him sincless with it.