Oh my dear lard Jesus.
Al Pachino is at his usual shenanigans again.
I'm sure you've heard that the world is supposed to end tomorrow.
Literally only God knows whether it's gonna happen or not, but Al Pachino is absolutely positive that it WILL, in fact, end.
His theory?
"The world is gonna end because the government is planning to break the Mississippi fault line tomorrow at 6:00 P.M. It's gonna be 9.5 earthquake in Mississippi and a 4.4 here in Azle! You gotta believe me! Go to Fema.gov!"
I went there just now.
It said nothing about a fault line, or about bogus government conspiracy's, or Jesus coming to take us to Heaven on his flying Unicorn.
I hope that there isn't an earthquake, only so my friends and I can point and laugh at him.
What is he going to say when he comes to school tomorrow, and nothing has happened?
"Yeah, so I was wrong. Laugh at me and I'll suck your blood dry."
To which I would respond,
"I bet you'd like that. Ooh, look at my veins, all supple, delicious, and exposed. Are you getting thirsty? I have a big ole supply of warm 98.7 degrees Fahrenheit blood in here."
This guy proves time, and time again, that he is not only insane, but also a total lunatic.
Seriously, somebody please call a mental hospital.
If the world does end tomorrow, the I'm taking my TOMS, my phone, and my charger.
Which leads me to this:
Do you think there's cable in Heaven? Because I will not miss the American Idol finale.
I can NOT believe Haley got voted off of American Idol!
I cna't believe that guy Scotty is still in.
He isn't that good. He sounds like EVERY OTHER male country singer in the world.
It wasn't supposed tp be like this.
It was supposed to be Lauren and Haley in the top 2, and they were going to tie, and both get recording contracts, and everything in the world would have been right.
Surely Haley will get a recording contract and be super successful.
I hope with all of my heart that Lauren wins.
All of you should text vote to American Idol, for Lauren.
She is my love.
No comments:
Post a Comment