Sorry that I didn't post monday! I procrastinate.
I few days ago I came into to school late. by literally 2 milliseconds. Well Mr. al pacino over here decides to make it clear to the whole class...that I'm late...by two milliseconds.
Al Pacino - "YOUR LATE!!!!!"
Me - "Your moms late."
Al Pacino - "YOUR PUBERTY'S LATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
....... -_ -........ This guy is ridiculous. There were so many things I could've said. He has a scar on his face that makes me think he was recently been jumped out of a gang or just got in one. He once told me a very disturbing and graphic story about him getting laid, that was VERY involuntary. I would write about it, but it is disturbing. Anyway I thought karma would get back at him. So wierdly...I let him get away with this.
Me - "Watch it asshole."
That was unlike me. He was lucky.
Later in the period I was a lot more mad. The whole "karma" thing passed. I was pissed. I was pissed that I missed my last chance to kick some ass. I was not going to miss it the next time. He started to ask the art teacher if his clay animal sculpture could have three legs. Both me and the teacher thought that was a stupid question and I said under my breath "Stupid." Scarface decided to come up with the most original insult anyone has ever said to me.
Al Pacino - "Yeah...well...YOUR GAY."
*hehaha! oooooh he is gonna die.*
Me - "Really? Did you just call me gay right now? Really?"
Al Pacino - "yep really!"
*This angers me. Time to emo screamo this bitch.*
Me in emo/screamo voice - "OH HELLNO! REALLY? no, really. Are you seriously calling me gay right now? What the hell? You do realize I will KILL you right? Couldn't you come up with something a little bit more..mmhh idaknow...ORIGINAL!??!?Youknow what 'Al Pacino' at least I don't have a scar on my face the size of Manhatten. Back The F off and go take a shower you smelly idiot. I will elbow you in the face."
Meanwhile during my fit of rage the art teacher is screaming almost as loud as me "CALM DOWN NOW!" When I finally got all my anger out, the teacher was all like "AL PACINO TO THE OFFICE." Then he called the office and said "Hey I just sent Al Pacino to the office. Yeah he just called ANOTHER kid gay again."
He took me out into the Hallway and said LITERALLY these words.
Teacher - "*sighs* look....I'm sick of that shit too but...."
My exact face - . ______________________ .
Teacher - "DAYAUM DUUUUDE!!!!! you gatta calm down!"
*20 second later...*
Me - "ummmmmmmm...ok. Can I go to the restroom?
after he said yes I hightailed it to the restrooom. After I got done laughing, I realized I was pissed. I was pissed at Al pacino and his mafia crew and his ugly dumb face. His dumby dumby dumb dumb head. I came back to the class and the teacher asked me to go to the office to fill out some forms or something. Strange.
I get there and I am sent in a room with Al Pacino and the vp.
I should've known. It was a trap.
I sat down and I was thinking "What the heyal?" Al started saying I called him a retarded and a stinky mexican and all this bullcrap. I didn't even get to tell my side of the story but the VP was all like "Yall don't know what happened to eachother. So you can't be bullies."
Ok let me just stop this right there. There is a difference between being a BULLY and being like me. Ok? A BULLY, is somebody that insults innocent people, like me, and tries to destroy every ounce of this person's confidence to where they explode and embarrass themselves in front of a WHOLE CLASSROOM. BULLYING is where you are such an asshole, that they drive you to stand up for yourself and end up getting hurt by somebody 10x their size. BULLYING is where you turn your victims into either a battered housewife or into somebody like me. SOMEBODY LIKE ME is a person who makes smart and funny retorts against a BULLY. SOMEBODY LIKE ME is a person who has to keep explaining to neanderthals, that it IS infact possible a STRAIGHT person can think gays should have rights. SOMEBODY LIKE ME is a person who is sent to the office, detention etc, for doing something to stand up for themselves. SOMEBODY LIKE ME defends innocent people against bullies. SOMEBODY LIKE ME never NEVER makes fun of innocent people. PEOPLE LIKE ME make fun of bullies. Bullies and people like me, are COMPLETE opposites.
I was forced to shake the jerk's hand, and say freaking sorry. I left the room steaming. I literallly went around the other side of the school as not to come in contact with Al Pacino. This was a sad day for people like me.
Later in the day,it turns out Mr. Pacino decided to tell K Fed about this. HIS version. HIS STUPID version. I was walking down the stairs on my way to my next class. For some reason the hallway was empty. As if it were an old western showdown. I hear K Feds blackccent say to me "Mess with my boy again, and you won' be able to mess with another person again." A tumbleweed crossed inbetween us.
Me - *turns around viciously.* Excuse me?"
K Fed - "You heard me bitch."
I actually do call him K Fed. Not just in the blog.
Me - "O.k. You don't know me so I am going to give you one chance to turn around and go the opposite direction."
K Fed - "I ain't scared."
Me - "Listen up K Fed. You have NO right to fuck with me. I have never done anything to you. You do not know the whole story. Even if you did you probably wouldn't even understand it, do to the fact that you have the IQ of Hitler. Your 'BOY' was the one messing with me. He is as big an asshole as your prison record. BACK OFF and goodbye. oh, and by the way K Fed, drop the blackccent. You live in friggin Azle Tx. Not Brooklyn."
K Fed - " Yea well y-"
Me - "Shut up bastard."
He is fricken scary as that Mel Gison audiotape, so I had a mini-seizure when I turned around.
Kevin Constien can you come to school with me so you can be like my bodyguard. I could really use a 6ft tall dude with muscles the size of Alaska on my side the rest if the year.
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